GENDER DYSPHORIA ; LGBT CAN BE CURED.

First and foremost, a little disclaimer that I don't remember most of the talk but I tried my best to write them all down. So if I'm wrong, please refer to someone with a more strong academic background regarding the matter okay? 

During the forum, there were three speakers that were present. All with their own experience and knowledge regarding the issue at hand. It was a simple forum between the speakers while students sat down and listened. We eventually got a chance to ask a few questions but it was educational nonetheless. 

The Questions That Was Asked

1. Does LGBT occur naturally or due to encouragement? 

Speaker A said that it was due to encouragement. It was based on how that person was raised. In 2018, it was stated that LGBT is not a mental illness and acknowledged how the gaming disorder was a more serious matter compared to LGBT. 

(the speaker kinda went off topic but here's the useful information)

The speaker continued, there's 49% more likeliness that Gay people can get HIV from sex. He questioned why do people acknowledge this and be accepting then he said that in Iran that people were given subsidy to undergo transexual transformations. In Malaysia, among 30,000 people at least one is gay while among 100,000 girls only 1 is a lesbian.

2. How does Islam refer LGBT as in the Hukm? 

Haram. Speaker B said that we are not here to discuss on what we want but we were supposed to be talking about what Allah SWT wanted. As humans, we forgot that simple thing. He also stated regarding the Quranic Verse that's talked about the Lut community. 

Allah SWT stated that " there was never a community that did what they did "

Clearly, he said it was humans who started this movement of LGBT. That definitely means that LGBT was never a natural phenomenon.

He also added in that Rasulullah SAW when mentioning lesbians and gays, he always stated Zina, sins and so on. Even if we were just playing around with the idea or just trying out different gender clothes, it is not advised. 

Always follow what Allah SWT wants. Never fall into your own desires. 

3. Chronology on being Gay?  

Speaker C is a former gay but he is a transformed person and now only focuses on his duty towards Allah SWT. He said the feelings started when he was 6, he had this feminine characteristic. He liked playing with girls and all the girly girl games such as cooking. He was more comfortable with girls as compared to boys because boys were always rough. He preferred the accompany of girls because they were always so gentle and nice to him. 

Whenever he was bullied by boys, the girls would back him up and he felt a sense of security. Which made him have this tendency to keep being what he felt he was. He felt confined when the teachers wouldn't let him play the games that he wanted because with the mentality that " boy is supposed to play football not go to cooking class " 

4. Can LGBT be cured? How? 

Speaker A said the first few steps of changing to LGBT is by using hormone or getting the transgender surgery. But one of the most important medical issues that LGBT is related to, is most probably HIV. 

There's a study, where they focused on heterosexual and homosexual couples that one of them is HIV positive and one is not. They observed whether or the HIV was transmitted after approximately 3 years of the study and 58,000 times of sexual activity. It was found that they were zero transmission of the HIV.
This indirectly encouraged the gay movement with the thought that HIV can be reduced. 

In 2017, 50% of HIV has been reduced. Now we can manage and control HIV but there is still no cure! Then, Speaker A stated that when the American's acknowledge that homosexuality is not a mental disorder, so it doesn't need a cure but was opposed by the Indonesians. They believe there is a cure. 

The American's rebuttal to the Indonesian statement was based on experiments, homosexuality is a genetic disorder and hormonal disorder but that example was more on kunsa. In Islam, it is allowed when the situation is like that however, LGBT is more on sexual desire. 

The only cure for LGBT is an intervention. Integrative medicine with Islamic input that is significant to the change of a person's desire. This is very important because it may enlighten people to the right path. For example, he said that the inclusion of the mak nyah community when dealing with the death of one of their own might change their perception. We are encouraged to use the correct communication skills, soft intonations as these group of people are very sensitive about their well-being. We have to always be patient with them, thats why Speaker A said that it was important that we fix ourselves beforehand helping the LGBT community. 

LGBT is a problem of the heart and soul. That's all. 

5. What is the relevance of boycotting LGBT is the view of Islam?

First and foremost, Speaker B started with the fact that we discussed hukm Islam regarding the issue. It was fundamental that we know the basis of this issue in Allah SWT's opinion. 

He said that we need to discriminate them. Now, hold on to your pants. He didn't mean discriminate them with us. He meant that even in Islam there are multiple levels of iman, why is that any different from them? From the most severe to the least. Not meaning, they're only half gay. Far from that, it means that they realize they're faults and have that sense of guilt or those who are influencing others. 

Being a good Muslim is not an option, its an obligation. 

There's no choice in the matter. And yet there are still levels for the Islamic community. That's similar to the LGBT. 

1. Nifa' 

2. Fasik 

3. Munafik

Based on these three categories, Munafik is the one that Speaker B insisted on stopping. The other two, he said we need to learn and advise them nicely because they're nearer to the path than the third one. Munafik group are promoting LGBT sins, so these are the people that we need to stop because they make others confused.

Speaker B finished off with a reminder that we should always be nice to these people and help them. Approach them nicely and InshaAllah, they'll eventually get back to the right path. 

Discriminate according to their needs. 

6. How did you change your view on LGBT and turned towards Allah SWT?

Previously, during the first question Speaker C already stated that he was most affected by the fact that his late father would be blamed in the afterlife about his lifestyle. 

He said that most LGBT people think. "its okay for now, when I'm approaching my death or later in life, I'll have time to repent" But then, when you reach a certain point of your life when you are unhappy with the mediocre lifestyle that society provides, you would revert to a radical approach and sell yourself. 

This was mainly because the discrimination that is happening around these type of people has made them turn back to the streets. Even when he was near to the path of Allah SWT, he was slowly changing. But with the problems that occur even when you stop, many would go right back. 

Eventually, he said, his heart was finally opening up to Allah SWT because he thought death was inevitable. 

He also reminded us that these people know when we're approaching them either we're fake or being sincere. If we're sincerely helping them, they won't reject fully our help but if we're fake, they'll know. 

7. The impact of LGBT who has gotten to the right path? 

Depression. Speaker A said that the statistics of depression cases regarding LGBT was very high. When you've lived a lavish lifestyle and you stop, who's going to help you? You can't get that amount of money anywhere. You'd be jobless and starving of hunger. So you'd eventually turn back to your ways. But this time, it's killing you inside. Because you know how wrong it is and yet you do it because you don't know where else you are going to get money for food. 

Depression due to starvation or just financial problems are common even for other people. But having these problems when you're just starting off, I can only imagine the devastations. Especially when some families have already disowned them. For those who actually due to the transsexual surgery where they remove your penis has a higher rate of suicidal compared to others.

This is because Speaker C stated that your heart and soul feels empty. You're not your full self. So if you're thinking of doing it, you should not do it to that extent. Just imagine if you change your mind. Be rational when changing. Take it slowly. 

8. How to deal with LGBT following the Islamic views? 

A common point of view is that you're practicing Islam but LGBT is not your responsibility. Our community has this saying " Kamu Agama Kamu, Saya Agama Saya" which means that you do you, I'll do me. This is even though a long-lasting saying in Malaysia because we believe that we shouldn't bother others, it's completely wrong. 

This belief is completely different from what Islam is about. Islam is a religion of community. 

The first thing that we are needed to do? Spread what Allah SWT has bestowed upon us. 

The 3 steps to help them : 

a) Education: educate them, attend usrah with them. even if you can't help them, tell someone who can.

b) Sincerely: with sincerity, your help may be blessed by Allah SWT and may help many more. Your initial intention should be sincere and eventually, the hidayah may be eased by Allah SWT.

c) Attitude: go personally and help them. Help them study the Quran, get them to pray together. Show the REAL and TRUE meaning of being Islam. 

9. The problems that LGBT have ever face? 

Speaker C started off saying that there was a movement where some would round them up and hit them randomly. They would do that to just any of the LGBT members. They would do it in groups. Sometimes just a broken arm but others may lead to a coma. 

He said that LGBT has had it rough so in order we wanted to help them, we need to be strong-willed and sincere with our actions. Maybe by that, they'll eventually end up finding their path on they're own. 

SG. PANDAN WATERFALL.

The other day, my classmates and I went to Sg. Pandan Waterfall. Just a little recreational outing at the begging of the semester. It was a lot of fun since everyone participated in a way that I am ever so grateful. No one sat out, everyone had their part in all of it and I guess it was a day to remember.

We drove out around 8 in the morning via convoi. It was most probably the best time every since we all just talked and sang our way there. (in my car, atleast). When we arrived, it was pretty much empty since we aimed to go there when it just opened. So not many public residents were there. 

There were stalls and shops that were still setting up their food. Family gathering up their stuff from the car to bring to the waterfall. It was just like a typical outing with the family, only a bunch of university students were gonna crash it and turn it into a family day outing. Whoops. 

So me and Nana waited for Dayah while she had to listen to the games briefing since we needed to send a represenatative. I called my parents to tell them i have safely arrived but the line there isn't that very good. Even for a Celcom users. But I successfully reached my parents and they just told me to be safe. 

Me and Nana ended up just sitting by the bridge and talked. We were wondering what took Dayah soo long but when the bridge was empty we didn't want to miss a chance for a photo op. When we started snapping, someone called my phone. 

It was Dayah.

She was just mad that we were taking pictures without her. Leaving her behind and what not. So me and Nana, giggling our way to Dayah to comfort her. It didn't take long for her to forgive us but it did need a lot of food. haha

Since we were in a somewhat war with Dayah, she literally drenched me with water and hooray, i was one of the first girlst that was covered with water. I wanted to keep it cool and take my time getting into the water. Since the water was very cold and alhamdulilah the weather that day wasn't that hot. The sun was just bright that day. Great for that sunkissed picture! 

Everything was all dandy. Everyone got to play games, have fun and no one died. THANK GOD! 

Here's a few more pictures from that day. There are a few people missing since it was technically a holiday and people wanted to go home. 

But most of us got to make it there and i guess we got a little bit closer by splashing in the water of fish pee. 

This was underneath the waterfall. There are some small fishes that played there but nothing major. Not leeches and what not. 

All in all, it was a lovely day. We had fun, spent time together. Got into a small adventure. Nothing too extreme but still every adventure teaches us  somethings such as, I should really start learning how to climb rocks properly hahaha. 




The facilities there are below average but its sufficient enough to go to the toilet and have a shower before leaving. A place to change and everything. The coconut water there. IS. DELICIOUS. Keropok lekor also available since we bought it for our trip back. You wouldn't be needing floats but they provide some for rental. Its actually not that deep but for kids, i guess so. I'm about 150, and I could still touch the floor. 

Everything is safe there but you gotta take care of each other and watch out for the sharp rocks! 

SHORT CUT.

Like most posts, I know I've been only talking about my feelings and love life. I rarely talk about my experience while studying. I'll try and get that as soon as I can comprehend how I actually study. 

Right now, I just want yguys to enlighten me with a few things. My life has been nothing but great so far. I'm more than thankful, for what i have been blessed with. I can never say that enough. 

But, when you're knocked with that occasional reminder that you shouldn't get too happy, I feel like, what did i do to deserve something like this? Something soo heart-wrenching? 

There are a few things that matter to me, my family, friends and my studies. Preferably in that order. All the worldy things that matter atleast. But if just by being your true self is bothering someone? Is it you who is the problem? Or that person?

Just when you're minding your own business, someone will still be unsatisfied with how you live. How you be happy. How you get the things you want.

Being all those things, isn't as easy as 1 2 3. Everyone knows that and yet people have this thought that I get everything by just letting it fall into my lap. I always take the long route, never the shortcut because i always believe that I am not worthy to take the short cut. 

So if it was you, just someone who's trying to stay true to youself and yet people are offended by it. Who's fault is that? Yours? So you need to change yourself? Or that person? 

TO SAY SOMETHING.

I literally have no words. I don't know what to say anymore. All these feelings are everything i've felt before. 

Yknow recently I came to the realization that all the things that supposedly showed me that I was falling for a guy, was all made up in my own mind. It was just me thinking of the things that seemed liked the scenes in the drama to be more than what they were. 

It was only me. Letting myself feel all these things. Thinking and believing these things. 

I was the only one that was feeling all these emotions when everything happened. I was the one delusional to think all the times we talked to each other, there was something when in fact there was literally nothing. 

And yet, I'm the one here crying, everynight or spending it sick to my stomach thinking about you. 

Maybe everyone around me is getting sick of me talking about the same thing again and again. They may even be tired of listening how often I say i've moved on and 10 seconds later, I'll still mention his name. So I end up keeping it to myself and just cry while watching drama or movies. 

But I don't want to feel this pain all alone. I need to explain it. So that I know what to do with it. Untill now, I can't...

It sometimes hurts so much, I can't breathe. You would think i'm exagerating and ofc I would agree because no one really likes to see the weak Ermi. 

Guess I'm just sorry how I haven't figured out how to be strong to overcome this...